Tuesday, October 16, 2012

The Elegant Simplicity of Death

No, I'm not considering shuffling off this mortal coil anytime soon. And I'm not sitting here in a macabre haze of depressed thoughts, contemplating my own demise.

But what I was thinking about was something that bothered me intensely, before I discovered the wonderful world of atheism. And that was this issue around where I was going to spend eternity - specifically, those people I was condemned to spend it with.

I mean - imagine spending eternity with a bunch of flaky, ignorant gits with an average IQ of 50 or lower? You know - the type you find chanting to Jesus on a Sunday morning / Wednesday night at home cell meetings - etc. Duh! Jesus gonna come take me outta dis mess. Yeah - right. And in this place, we find Catholic child molesters (who are forgiven by Jesus), my gaslighting holier-than-thou extended family who lie through their teeth and don't confront their very real wrongdoings - but hide behind Jesus; sundry priests, bishops and the cash-extorting televangelist crew who will sell your mother for sixpence. Not a bunch I'd like to be confined with for eternity - thank you very much.

And the singing! Errgghh!! As someone who has been involved to an extent in the music business, I am profoundly irritated by those who consistently mangle music. "And let's repeat (for the 45th time) the chorus, shall we - 3 semitones and a bum note below where it should be?" Rather not. Let's get a life and move on. Could I possibly stand to spend eternity with this, in heaven? 'Onward Christian soldiers, marching off to war.." Nope. Not a chance.

So let's switch to the other side of the equation, and in hell we find.....Hitler, Stalin, my gaslighting narcissist lying extended family's alter-ego (the split personality part that didn't get to repent in time), sundry politicians, estate agents and used car salesmen, as well as mass murderers (those who didn't repent on death row), thieves and rapists. Brrrr!! Not my kind of company, thank you!

But thank goodness - evolution and science to the rescue! (I nearly said "thank god". Need to think up some new expressions, now that god is a spent force).

Guess what - we get to spend eternity...... on our own. rotting away in the ground, if we're buried or flying in the breeze if we're cremated! And there's not too much wrong with that! Don't have to spend my dead days fending off a bunch of christian creeps or murderers.

PS- better get used to being an introvert! The worst I can think of is the Christian extrovert who gets to find out (too late) that he's spending eternity on his own!!! Whheeeeee!!!! (heh heh)!

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