Do you wake up in the morning without a hard-on that can raise the roof and dislodge the roof tiles?
Do you wake up sometimes without an erection at all?
If so, you could be suffering from Floppicox Syndrome - YES! Floppicox Syndrome!!
Floppicox Syndrome was discovered by 2 doctors : Dr F.L. Opperman and Dr J.T (John Thomas) Cox
This potentially lethal disability can ruin your whole life and future happiness!
But Wait! There's hope! Ask your Doctor for Merck Lab's "Stiffen Up" or Pfizer's "Pole in a Mo' "
Ask today and live a life of freedom from tomorrow!" (Sounds more like Poppycock Syndrome to me).
Or what about this variant?
"Do your Fartz embarrass you? When was the last time your partner went "eeeeeuuuuggghhh!" when they came out of your recently-vacated toilet? Or when last did you notice traffic screeching to a halt outside because they thought it was the rumble of an earthquake - or maybe a ship sailing down the road, sounding its airhorn?
You could be a victim of Megafartz Syndrome. When you suffer from Megafartz, the little bacteria in the intestine get lazy and stop doing their job of breaking down nutrients into water and harmless CO2. Instead you get a buildup of deadly methane, sulphur dioxide and other atmospheric pollutants. And unchecked, in time, you can kill yourself and your family if you're not careful. And if you live in the EU, or in countries where they are monitoring carbon emissions, you could be presented with a nasty cold sharp measuring probe (for obvious uses), followed by a BIG fine.
But now there's hope. Lilly Labs in conjunction with Glaxo-Wellcome Smithkline Beecham have devised a life-saving new drug that effectively and safely calms and retrains the bacteria, reconverting them into models of bacterial efficiency. A single course - or maybe two - will result in peace and harmony in the home - and no nasty threat of Fart-Police raids embarrassing you and frightening the kids!
Ask your doctor about Lilly/ G-W SK-Beecham's "Fartless 'n Free" and set your intestines free again!"
Does any of this sound familiar? Go and watch "Big Bucks Big Pharma - Marketing Disease and Pushing Drugs" - how the large pharmaceutical companies cynically exploit our gullibility through advertising sickness - effectively inventing new disabilities for which we can spend huge amounts of money being "cured". See how the large pharmas get onto the bandwagon, offering incentives from the time the trainee doctors enrol at med school.
By the way - what do you think ADD is? Attention Deficit Disorder. Go and find out how much Big Pharma profited from this delicious little problem. What do you expect if you feed your kids junk food and sit them in front of a TV set all the time? Or TV games? (none of these in moderation). Did it ever occur to feed simple nutritious food, lots of exercise and stimulation of the mind and imagination - i.e. actually interact with your kids? Did anyone realise that kids need to be trained - as much to concentrate as to do anything else. Or is this too much like hard work?
Life doesn't come naturally - it takes training in all things. But no - somebody decided to give it a silly syndrome name (so we didn't have to feel guilty about being lousy parents), and out came the Big Pharma cure-all : drugs, drugs and more drugs- amphetamines, anti-depressents etc - all with side-effects for which you can be given more drugs.
Check out http://www.webmd.com/add-adhd/adhd-medication-chart and at the bottom of the chart we have:
"The FDA has issued a warning about the risk of drug abuse with amphetamine stimulants. FDA safety advisors are also concerned about the possibility that all amphetamine and methylphenidate stimulants used for ADHD may increase the risk of heart and psychiatric problems.
The FDA has also issued a warning about a connection between antidepressants (including the non-stimulant Strattera) and an increased risk of suicide in adults aged 18-24, especially in the first one or two months of treatment.
While these risks may seem alarming, keep in mind that experts generally consider these medicines safe...."
RIGHT!!! The Experts!!!! Which experts? Oh - those experts who have been receiving golf clubs, memberships, freebies, and weekly visits from the medical reps. Yeah - right. What happened to common-sense?
And if any of this disturbs you - and we hope it does, you can explore Codex Alimentarius
and find out how the World Health Organisation in conjunction with Big Pharma and the large international financiers are rolling out an international agreement, which if implemented across all signatory countries, will result in our freedom to eat healthy and choose alternative and natural medications (including garlic, and even, potentially, water!!) being curtailed. I kid you not. Natural herbs, garlic etc. would be available only on prescription from a GP, and supplied only through Big Pharma.
Where I come from, that's called "anti-competitive practice". Sadly, governments are so hand in glove with large corporations these days, that they no longer seem to be prosecuting this. Your freedom to remain healthy by eating healthy has just been terminated. Go and stand in the sickie queue for your prescription.
Do we really think the pharmaceutical companies are going to put themselves out of business by allowing people to actually be cured of their ailments, or condoning prevention of illness through education?
As Donald Trump says "It's nothing personal - it's just business".
Spread the word - for your sake, mine, and everyone else's.